Beautiful Letter

A few weeks ago, I sent letters to our former foster son and his Grandma, who is now raising him. His Grandma has given Miles & I unlimited access to J, but after spending time with him a couple of times after he went to go live with her, we made the decision that it was causing him too much pain and confusion to be with us again and he would cry and cling to us when we returned him to Grandma. So we let her know our decision and why we made it. Then a few weeks ago I sent those letters. The one to his Grandma was just to explain again the reason for our decision, and to let her know that we are praying for them. Then I wrote a letter to J that told him how much Miles & I loved him, what a joy he was to us, and our hopes for how God will use his life one day. It was a cathartic experience for me as well, to be able to say those words to him and to have them written down where he can read them one day when he gets older. I also included a picture of J, Miles & I because Grandma had asked for one to put in his "grandparents" book that she is making for him (a baby book of sorts).

Today in the mail we received a Christmas card from Grandma, with a few scanned pictures of J, and a beautiful letter for me. It was very touching, and since I will never be able to read it aloud on the phone without sobbing, I am putting it here so that my family can read it. The pictures were adorable as well, and he is looking so much like a little boy rather than a baby. He will be 2 on January 22, and he is still a very handsome boy. Anyway, here is the letter:

"Dear Brenda,
I apologize for not getting back to you about the voicemail you left me, but I did not get the voicemail until about 3 weeks later. My phone took up swimming in the toilet (courtesy of J) and I could not check my voicemail due to the lack of knowing my password for it. I rec'd your letter(s) and photo and yes, I saw J's confusion too. Your letter made me cry, even though your reasons are to put J first. I thank God everyday that my grandson was placed with you and Miles. We were very blessed.

I showed J the photo of the 3 of you and his little face just lit up into a huge smile. "Hod it grammy," he said, so I let him hold the photo and pointed and told him your names and that these were two very important people in his life and grammy would fill him in when he gets older. I'm planning to place your letter to J next to the photo you gave me in the grandparents book I'm making for him. I would still like to send you photos now and again, if thats alright?

He's grown so much. Since having tubes in his ears, his vocabulary and speech has greatly improved (no ear infections either). I wonder at times if I have done the right thing for J, but that all disappears when he crawls up in my lap and says, "Hod you grammy. I love you" and blows a big kiss on my cheek.

You and Miles are always in our prayers at night. Thank you Brenda. God bless you both and Merry Christmas."

That letter makes all of the frustrations with foster parenting worth it!

Merry Christmas

This was a quiet Christmas for us. We were supposed to drive to McMinnville, OR to spend the holidays with my (Brenda's) side of the family. Unfortunately, weather prevented us from going anywhere as we continue to get snowed on and approach totals of almost 4 feet! So it was just Miles & I this year. On Christmas Eve, we went to the service at our church and then went out to a very nice dinner at the Coeur d'Alene Resort. It was a non-traditional Christmas Eve dinner for us, but we figured we would do something fun and unusual since all of our other plans were thwarted. After dinner we came back to our house and opened gifts and drank homemade hot chocolate.

On Christmas day we slept in, called family, and then together made my family's traditional breakfast of Swedish pancakes. Oh, and we opened our stockings of course. We were supposed to go up to Miles' family's home in Sandpoint, but the weather really wasn't cooperating as it continued to snow all night and most of today. So we had a relaxing afternoon, and then decided to burn off some energy and build a snowman. I don't have any recollection of ever building a snowman, so this was my inagural attempt at it. It was a difficult task just because the snow is so fluffy that it was a struggle to get it to compact enough to stay in the correct formation. But we eventually succeeded. We had to improvise for the accessories, and used Raisenettes for eyes, a biscotti for the nose, and spray paint for the mouth! I think our neighbors were pretty amused by us.

Now I'm smelling the wonderful aroma of a ham baking in the oven, and we're gonna have a nice Christmas dinner complete with ham, scalloped potatoes, and green bean casserole. So in spite of the sudden change in plans, it turned out to be a very good Christmas. I am so blessed by a wonderful husband who makes every day, and every experience, fun and memorable and who fills my life with more love than I often know what to do with. I hope all of you who are reading this also had a wonderful Christmas holiday with your family and friends, and have paused to thank Christ for coming to this earth as a little baby to offer us grace beyond measure from a God who loves us more than we will ever be able to comprehend. As my Grandma said to me today (and decided she would like to officially change it to this greeting) -- HAPPY CHRISTMAS & MERRY NEW YEAR!

The snow just won't stop!!

I think it has snowed non-stop for a week. Or maybe it just feels like that. We got about 34 inches of snow in about a 36-hour period last week, then it snowed again on the weekend, and it's supposed to snow another 8-12 inches tomorrow. And in between all of those big storms we've had consistent flurries. We had to cancel our drive out to McMinnville, OR, to spend Christmas with the Eckdahl side of the family. So Miles & I are just going to have a quiet Christmas with the 2 of us, and then go to his family's house in the afternoon on Christmas Day (if we can get there!) By the time the next storm comes through tomorrow, we will have accumulated as much snow as we normally do all winter! Only we're just officially a few days into winter and still have months left to go to shatter records. It's insane. There are berms that are probably 15-20 feet high in some places because the temps have been cold so none of the snow has melted yet. This is a picture of my van in front of the berm that lives in our cul-de-sac every winter courtesy of the snow plow. Pretty soon I'm not going to be able to back out of my driveway because I almost hit the berm now!

Miles went snowboarding today for the first time this season, so there are benefits to it. And I've decided that I'm going to take up snow-shoeing. If you can't beat it, might as well enjoy it. And I'm certainly not going to be house-bound for the next 4 months!

There is a house for sale 2 doors down and it's unoccupied, so except for a path someone shoveled to make it to the front door the snow continues to pile up in their driveway. I was joking that they're not going to be able to sell it until spring because it's going to just eventually disappear under all the snow!

Large weather we're having . . .

It started snowing sometime in the middle of Tuesday night/early Wednesday morning, and hasn't stopped since. It's Thursday at 8:00a.m. and it still hasn't slowed down. And we're going to continue getting heavy snow until 4:00p.m. this afternoon. We're getting estimates of 1 1/2-3 inches of snow throughout the area so far, with maybe 12-15 inches more to come. I think, based on this picture of Miles, that we've gotten 2+ feet in our neck of the woods. It's crazy!! The other picture is his car in the driveway. At least I think that's his car under there. Who knows at this point!


Planes are being cancelled, schools are closed, federal offices and community centers are closed . . . everything in the area is closing down today. I just heard on the news that even police officers are having to be shuttled from their house so they can show up to work. I think I'll just stay home today and get some work done. Of course, Miles is chomping at the bit to get out there and snowboard, but I think he'll have to wait until tomorrow because I don't think he'll make it up the mountain today.

Thanksgiving

We had a very low-key and relaxing Thanksgiving. On Wednesday we drove an hour north, to Sandpoint, to Miles' sister and family's home. We spent the night with them there. On Thanksgiving day we did a lot of cooking, eating and relaxing. My sister-in-law asked me to make the crust for her green bean casserole dish, but I was nervous because I'm not the best cook or baker in the world. So everyone made a big deal about me actually "cooking" and took lots of pictures. It turned out pretty good. But I'll still leave our cooking up to Miles. He's much better at it!

Speaking of baking/cooking . . . . last night I was going to try my hand at making Divinity. I remember my Grandma George made that candy every year around Christmas and I loved it. So I found an easy recipe online and had these grand visions of sending homemade Divinity candy to Debbie when I sent her package of Christmas gifts. Well, I'd like to say that something was wrong with the recipe, but it's more likely that it was an error on my part. Needless to say, the stuff never hardened like it's supposed to and I stirred that concoction for about 20 minutes. It was mostly marshmallow, with some sugar, water and vanilla, so I had the bright idea to turn it into Rice Krispie squares. I went ahead and did it. I think I made the sweetest Rice Kristie squares ever! I still sent it to Debbie. I figured she can either throw it away or her kids will eat it and never know the difference! I'm still determined to learn how to make Divinity like my Grandma.

You all need to move to Coeur d'Alene!

Here is one of the top 10 reasons all of you should move to Coeur d'Alene:

Proof

Here's proof for Debbie who didn't believe me when I told her our gas prices.

New Car

I'm one of "those" people who really likes driving a minivan. Unfortunately, my last minivan had a lot of issues and was in the shop frequently, so we decided to sell it for cheap and invest in something more reliable. We've been a one car family for about 6 weeks now while we researched and saved money for another car. God provided for our needs once again and we were able to get something a lot sooner than we anticipated. So this past weekend I picked out my new minivan! It's a 2006 Chrysler Town & Country. It's almost identical to my other van on the inside, but it only has 16,000 miles. This one better last me for years and years!

Seasons

Fall is definitely here and it's spectacular as always. The leaves have turned color and are falling off the trees at alarming rates. The air has turned crisp and sometimes downright cold. It gets dark too early and stays dark too late. Oh, and the most obvious sign of all . . . Costco has put out their Christmas decorations!

So I thought I'd just post a short update about this "season" in our lives. It's funny how our lives really go in seasons too, huh? As the writer of Ecclesiastes says, "There is a time for everything." Right now our season and our time is as a family of two. It has truly been nice to be able to slow down a little bit, focus on each other as a couple, and focus on some other important things like our relationship with God and with others. Speaking of that, 2 weekends ago Miles & I had the incredible privilege to borrow a friend's condo at a nearby ski resort town and get away for a spiritual retreat. We practiced the discipline of silence during part of our time away (yes, even silence from speaking to each other) and it was a very sweet time with God for both of us. We were right at the base of a mountain and it was absolutely gorgeous. I don't know if you've ever seen Tamarack trees at the height of fall, but they provide beautiful fall colors and can be quite breathtaking.

I've also been able to spend a lot of time with the girls from my small group. It is such a privilege to watch them grow in their relationships with Christ and to be a part of their lives in so many other ways. Last weekend one of the girls hosted a spaghetti dinner at her house just to provide some "hang out" time. After dinner we played on the Wii and I got my first stab at "Rock Band." Boy I feel old when I try and play video games because I'm usually so inept. As evidenced by me getting so into my role as drummer that I hit myself in the eye really hard with the drum stick and almost gave myself a black eye! Yep, I'm talented!!

This weekend we get to attend an adoption party for our very dear friends who just finalized the adoption of their foster son. He is 1 1/2 years old now and has been with them since birth. We are absolutely thrilled to celebrate this occasion with them. They're also going to dedicate him at church this weekend and I've told my friend that I am already prepared to cry during the entire dedication service. God is so faithful, no matter what season we are in.

Well, that's it for now. I'm off to continue biting my nails as I anxiously await the final results of the election.

Blast from the Past

Today I babysat Grace, the last foster baby we had, who left in July. A friend of mine is doing respite care for Grace, and had to work today, so I offered to watch her. Mostly it's because within a week or two Grace will be moving to Washington state with an aunt to whom the State is giving custody. It was nice to see her again and have some closure. She is now 6 months old, and although she still looks so much like the little baby girl we had, she is obviously more alert and advanced. As you can see from these pictures, she still enjoys sticking her tongue out. She was teething today, so she slept for 3 1/2 of the 7 hours she was at our house. But during the times she was awake, we had fun together! I also had the privilege of spending some quiet moments rocking her, and prayed over her and her life. Precious moment.

Apples!

On Saturday Miles & I went apple picking at a local farm. We picked a bunch of apples and then today I had my first attempt at making a homemade apple pie. We just ate some of the results and it was pretty good! Thanks to Debbie's (formally Bev's) easy apple pie recipe. Now I have to figure out what else to make because I still have quite a few apples that I need to do something with this week.

I'm a Grandma

One of the girls from my small group had a baby girl today, so I think that makes me a "small group Grandma." This was not a planned pregnancy, but the girl is committed to doing her best with her new role as mommy. I am just amazed by the other girls who have surrounded her with love and support rather than judgment. After all, isn't that what Jesus modeled for us? It makes me realize how much I desire to see "my girls" make good decisions and honor God with their lives. But also how much I am not in control of the decisions they make and need to pray for them on a daily basis. If you think of Mandy and her new baby girl, Lily, please pray for them. And pray for me. I SO DON'T want to make this a situation in which I am angry because Mandy has something I have been praying for, but really want to surround Mandy with love and support, and guidance as she pours her life into this new little baby girl. I know God has a plan for us that is good and wise. And I trust Him to reveal it when the time is right.

Car Troubles

So my beloved minivan is being laid to rest for good. We bought it used a year and a half ago and in the last 6 months have put a lot of money into repairs on it. Yesterday I broke down while I was running errands and after getting it towed to the repair shop, we were told that it needs a new fuel pump. That is very expensive. So we've decided to dump the "money pit" and sell it as is. We'll be a one car family for now until we figure out what we want to do next. I'm so sad because I love my van. Oh well . . .

Seattle and Small Group

2 weekends ago, Miles & I took a wonderful trip to Seattle. We went there so Miles could attend Coffee Fest -- a 3 day convention all about coffee. The church sent him to the convention because he is the lead trainer for our church's coffee stand/cafe. I just went along for the adventure and to get free coffee!! We got to Seattle on Thursday afternoon and that night we went to a Jewel concert. She is a remarkable singer and really showcases her voice during her live concerts. It was a great concert because it was an acoustic concert, so it was just Jewel and her guitar. We had a great time. Friday and Saturday were spent at Coffee Fest all day and then we spent the evenings exploring and playing around the city. We stayed until Monday afternoon so we could get the most out of our time there. The weather was absolutely gorgeous. Even though we live only a 5-hour drive away from Seattle, I've never spent time there so I was very excited about this trip. I definitely want to go back more, but being in a big city again sure made me appreciate our simple little town of Coeur d'Alene. I'm so used to a small town now that even Coeur d'Alene is getting big for me!

This past weekend I had a "girls night" with my new small group girlies. Rychelle & I are going to continue leading a small group. Most of the girls have left for college this fall, but a few of them have stayed locally to attend the community college or work full-time. So instead of 15 girls, we're going to have 6. What a difference! But we're very excited about it because it will give us the opportunity to go deeper and invest more time individually with each of the girls. So Saturday night we had a sleepover to sort of kick off our new group. We also have a new member, so the girls shared their testimonies with each other. It was a wonderful night. These girls are very special to me and such a blessing in my life.

End of an Era

Miles & I have both been serving in youth ministry for over a decade. Recently we have felt God leading us away from that specific ministry and have given our "resignation" to our youth pastor. We don't know yet what God has in store for us next, but will be praying and seeking His direction over the next few months. Miles still volunteers in our church's coffee ministry, Hebrews, and is the lead trainer with that ministry. All of the money raised goes directly to the church's mission fund to send out teams locally and globally. I will also continue to lead my small group that I've been leading for the past 4 years. Most of the girls in the group are now in college or are working full-time and it's such a personal blessing to watch them grow into young, Godly women. This is really my passion -- to do one-on-one or small group discipleship and teaching.

We'll see what God has for us next. We will both continue on with our current ministries -- Hebrews and small group -- but still feel like there is something more that God has in store for us. It's just time for a new season in our lives and a new season of ministry for us. It feels strange to not go to youth group every Sunday night, but we still maintain personal relationships with many of the students and that won't change.

Backyard adventures

So we couldn't get away for Labor Day weekend because Miles had responsibilities at the church. He's the lead barista for the coffee ministry, Hebrews. But we really wanted to go camping, so we compromised and camped in our backyard! It was fun. We just pulled our sleeping bags out on to the grass and laid there and looked at the stars until we fell asleep. With all of the huge pine trees surrounding our yard, it was almost like we were camping!

Trials

It seems that this week so many people in my life are being hit hard by trials . . . loss of relationships, miscarriages, sickness, depression and bad verdicts in court. I was talking to one girl yesterday, one of my "girls" from small group who has been struggling in her faith recently and is one of the ones being slammed by trial. Her question to me was: "Why is God doing this?" I tried to assure her that God is not doing this to her but stuff like this happens because we live in a broken world filled with sadness and sickness. In fact, I told her, God grieves right alongside us and longs to give her comfort. This was not what she wanted to hear because she just wanted someone or something to blame.

This got me to thinking. I wonder why our world often rejects the idea of God, refuses to acknowledge Him as the Lord and Saviour of their lives, yet when faced with tragedy or trial are so quick to blame God. I think this baffles me because I don't know what I would do in my own life if I didn't have God as THE source of support, comfort and healing. In the past 5 years as Miles & I have been struggling with infertility, I've had people ask if we get angry at God. "No," is my answer. I don't get angry at God. I question Him, not because I think He is to blame, but because in the midst of living in a broken world I often wonder what His plan is for me and in our particular situation, if we will ever be parents. I couldn't travel this journey without God. I wouldn't know where to turn. And my heart breaks for those who choose to go through trials in their own strength because I know that is not necessary. God LONGS to walk alongside and give us a peace and a joy we cannot find nor know without Him.

Lately I've been listening to a lot of the interviews with Steven Curtis Chapman and his family. For those of you living in a cave, the Chapman family (Christian recording artist) recently lost their 5-year old daughter in a terrible tragedy in the driveway of the family's home. The Chapmans have been on Good Morning America, Focus on the Family, People magazine, Larry King Live, etc. and have been sharing their story of loss, grief, love and hope. It's those last 2 that a lot of people are missing. Mary Beth Chapman, Steven's wife, shared that when this happened to their family, it was like falling flat on their faces because it was such an unexpected and tragic event. And they didn't land on their feet when they fell; they fell flat on their faces. But what they learned was that when they fell, the foundation they had been building their lives on was secure. Steven has a song called "Yours" on his new album. After their daughter's death, he penned a new verse for the song. This song has come to speak to me very much in the last few weeks.

Last verse of Yours (and chorus):
I’ve walked the valley of death’s shadow
So deep and dark that I could barely breathe
I’ve had to let go of more than I could bear
And questioned everything that I believe
But still even here
in this great darkness
A comfort and hope come breaking through
As I can say in life or death
God we belong to you.

And it’s all Yours God, Yours God
Everything is Yours
From the stars in the sky to the depths of the ocean floor
And it’s all Yours God, Yours God
Everything is Yours
All the greatness and power, the glory and splendor and majesty
Everything is Yours
It’s all Yours

Camping

Miles and I just got back from a weekend camping trip. I think this trip has officially clinched the top spot as my favorite camping trip ever. We had originally planned to camp Thursday-Sunday, and then spend a night at our favorite Bed & Breakfast on Sunday night. We drove 2 hours to our chosen camping spot at Priest Lake, and soon learned that the information we had received about not being able to reserve campsites was wrong information. The only way to get a spot in these campgrounds was to reserve sites. It's a beautiful lake, and we hope to camp there one day, but it wasn't to be for this weekend. So with dusk coming, and not having any idea where we wanted to set up camp for the weekend, we headed for the bed and breakfast. Thankfully she had a room available that night. We spent the night there and then headed north the next morning.




We drove about 5 miles into Montana, up in the northernmost corner of the state, just south of Canada. We found a BEAUTIFUL spot by the Yaak River and I think we landed the most beautiful site in the entire campground. We camped there Friday thru Monday, and it was wonderful.



We spend a lot of time relaxing and just enjoying each other's company. I feel so lucky that I have a husband who also happens to be the person I'd most like to spend time with. We always have a lot of fun together. We spent one day exploring the area nearby, and hiked to Kootenai Falls and also crossed a "swinging bridge" that hung precariously over the raging river. Needless to say, that walk across the bridge wasn't my favorite thing in the world! But I did it because, after all, I believe you should do one thing every day that scares you!!

Miles went fishing a few times and caught some good fish. I don't really like anything having to do with fish, but I agreed to try it after he prepared his first catch. I actually liked it. We also brought 2 fish home to eat this week. While Miles was fishing in the afternoons, I spent time in the hammock (thanks Deb & Darin!) reading my book, journaling and listening to worship music. Overall, it was a great weekend with lots of time with my husband and lots of time with God. I needed both of those desperately.

Our new pet

Yesterday a deer came into our backyard and starting snacking on our foliage. He came over under our bedroom window and was munching on the plants there. Then he just laid down in the shade and napped for about 1/2 hour. He was so cute. We've declared him our new pet and are waiting for him to return!

Another goodbye

Baby Grace is leaving this evening. And Miles and I are going to use this opportunity to take a sabbatical as foster parents and renew and refresh ourselves. It will be good to spend time as a couple again and to do the things we enjoy that we haven't been able to do much of over the last 2 years because we've had babies in the house -- hiking, kayaking, camping, biking, going on dates, etc.

4th of July

Grace and her "cousins" from Minnesota -- Logan, Tyson and Avery











Grace with her Aunt Debbie
















Fun with sparklers!!!

Beautiful Grace

Here are more pictures of Grace. She is growing like a weed. She has weekly visits with mom and they're going okay. Mom really doesn't know how to hold her or interact with her because of her own mental impairment. Mom is 23 years old and wears "Hannah Montana" jewelry and collects Hannah Montana stuff. That is just a clue to where her emotional age is. Grace saw her "dad" once, but there will be a paternity test to determine if he really is the dad. He cannot have any more visits until those results are back. I'm hoping that he isn't the dad, because his sister has said that she wants Grace.

We are still taking care of our friend's foster daughter, Kilee. I think it's wearing on all of us. I've had to totally readjust my schedule to accommodate Kilee's appointments and visits with her foster parents. She will definitely be gone before next Thursday, because Debbie and her kids are coming to visit for 9 days and our house isn't big enough to fit everyone!

I have to catch up on some work, so I'll post pictures and write more of an update later.

Welcome to North Idaho

It is June 10. It snowed last night around here and it's supposed to be a high of 52 today. I don't think summer is every going to get here. AAGGHHHHH!!!!

God Will Provide

This is going to be a short post. This is a sign that Debbie bought for us that says "God Will Provide" in Latin. Miles & I have wanted to put this phrase up in our house somehow, and thanks to a company called UpperCase Living, we can do it! Thanks, Debbie. It looks great and is a great reminder of God's abundant and timely provision for us.

Crazy Week

This has been a weird week. A weird month, really. So I'll tell it in pictures.

Here's a recent picture of Grace. She's still an amazing and cute baby. She's been having a rough time lately, which we thought was acid reflux, but it hasn't been getting much better on medication. Well, I might have found the culprit today. As unbelievable as this sounds, I think she's getting 2 bottom teeth. I'll feel stupid if I'm wrong, but I've showed 2 people and they both agree with me. One of my friends said she knew someone whose baby got teeth at 2 or 3 months old. I don't know if I'm just seeing things. How strange would that be to have a 2 month old with teeth?! No other news on her. She hasn't seen her mom in 2 weeks and no visits are scheduled yet.


This is Kilee. She is 13 months old and is the foster daughter of our friends Becca and Nick. They also had a baby girl who was 7 weeks old -- exactly a week older than Grace. On Sunday afternoon the baby died from SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). Until the State is finished with the investigation, they have to remove all other foster children. So we've been doing respite for Kilee this week. The investigation still isn't finished, so we'll have her at least through this weekend and maybe into next week. She's a really good baby and is adorable. Unfortunately, we have to be present when Nick and Becca spend time with her so it's taken some juggling of schedules. Really we've just been having them over at our house almost all day until they put Kilee down for bed at night. They've had her since she was 6 weeks old and are going to adopt her soon, so it's been very rough not to have her with them.


Yes, this is Jordyn. We have started communicating with his Grandma, who is open to us keeping a relationship with Jordyn. So we had a "date" today. I took him to story time at the library, lunch at McDonald's (and the playland of course!), and then played at our house in the afternoon. It was good to see him. He recognized us immediately. It really wasn't as difficult or sad as I thought it would be, until I had to drop him off to Grandma and he clung to me and cried when I handed him over. He also looks healthier and happier than I expected. Thank goodness. You can tell Grandma dotes on him.






This last picture is for Deb's sake. On the left is a picture of me as a baby and on the right is Deb's daughter, Avery. Uncanny resemblance, huh? I told Deb that she loves me so much she had a daughter who looks like me! :)

Well that's enough for now. Please keep our friends Nick & Becca in your prayers as they grieve the loss of their foster daughter.

Praises

My parents were in town this week at a local campground, so we got to spend a few days with them. It was very nice, and Grace was very spoiled by Grandma. I think she was held for 3 days straight! Nothing new on Grace right now. She had one more visit with mom, who was pretty frazzled because Grace has been very cranky and at time inconsolable due to acid reflux. She's now on medication and it should start to take effect in the next few days. I can't believe how big she is growing. She is 9 1/2 pounds now. She is also more alert and will focus on your face. She has smiled at me a few times now, which always makes my heart melt.

Now for the praise report . . . . God answered prayer for our family in a HUGE way this week. Miles started working for a friend from church who owns a hardwood flooring company. So even though I miss him now that he's gone all day, he is earning money. He was also hired by a company in Seattle to do some technical writing for them. He can do that from home, and will be starting within the next few weeks. But best of all, Miles sold 2 aerial photography systems this week!!! After almost 5 months of no activity in the business in terms of sales, he sold 2 on consecutive days. God is so amazing!! This money is going to carry us through for a few months, and it will also give Miles revenue to do more marketing for the business so he can in turn sell more systems. Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us.

Oh, and on a totally unrelated note, will you all pray for the family of Christian recording artist Steven Curtis Chapman (SCC)? I don't know if you have heard about the tragedy that struck their family this week. Their youngest adopted daughter from China (Maria -- 5 years old) was run over in the driveway by one of the teenage Chapman boys and she died later that night. Go to www.stevencurtischapman.com to read the story, see a video of Maria, and to send a note of encouragement to the Chapman family. I feel like I know this family because SCC has been one of my favorite Christian artists since I was in high school. I've been to every single concert of his and his music has had a profound impact on my life. Just pray for this family, and that God will use this tragedy to heighten their ministry opportunities.

Mother's Day

Miles blessed me with one of the most amazing Mother's Day gifts ever. He framed pictures of our current and past foster children, and then wrote me one of the most beautiful letters ever. It is something I'll cherish for a long, long time. These pictures are going on the wall right away. He didn't get the chance to frame 2 of the kid's pictures -- Shawn (the 15 year old we had first), and baby girl Tyler. But we'll get those done ASAP and add them to the collection. What a wonderful way to be honored today, to see all of the children God has blessed us with these last 2 years.

Grace

Here are some recent pics of Grace. She'll be a month old on the 13th. So hard to believe we've already had her a month. She is still such a good baby. She likes to cuddle, and is having more "awake" time as the weeks go on.

She has had 2 visits with mom now. I actually sat in on the last visit to help mom with Grace. Mom is very low-functioning and can't be in the room alone with the baby. The social worker observed us via closed circuit television, and took notes for the court report. It was quite an interesting experience, to say the least. I kept asking mom questions about how she feels about being a mom, what her life is like, etc. She likes to talk about herself so she just rambled on and on, with no consideration for what is "acceptable" to share. I even heard about the night Grace was conceived. I told the social worker later that I think I threw up in my mouth. Just kidding. But it was a lot of information to learn about her on the first meeting! What was interesting is that as she talked, she almost forgot she was holding Grace, and a few times I thought she was going to drop her. Mom got so caught up in talking about herself that she would relax her arms until Grace would start moving or whining, and then she'd say, "Oh," as if she totally forgot she was holding the baby. The social worker said that everything about mom, how she responds to the baby, what is going on in her life (transient lifestyle, etc.) is the same as it was with her first 2 children. Hopefully it's just a matter of time before mom agrees to voluntarily terminate her rights, and then we just have to hope that no relative of mom's or dad's steps forward and wants to take the baby.

We do have some really good friends who have just learned that they will be able to adopt their foster son. They've had him since birth and he's 10 months old now. I am so thrilled for them and can't wait to celebrate at his adoption party this summer. I know that one day we'll be hosting adoption parties of our own. I'm just thankful that we have people to walk this journey with us.

Crazy Days

I am in the midst of a very crazy two weeks. Today is Monday, and I'm already looking forward to Friday -- not this coming one, the next one! Last Friday I spent the day driving to Lewiston (2 1/2 hours south of us) to meet with 2 of the boys whom I am trying to get adopted, and doing a photo shoot with them and a professional photographer. Saturday I spent the entire day at a training for Royal Family Kids Camp. This is the camp for local foster kids that Miles and I volunteer for every summer. I am a part of the training team, so I had to be there all day, and it was a LONG day. Grace had a very rough night that night. I think being out of the house all day Saturday, and then being passed around while I was busy leading the training was just too much for her. I was up with her from 12:30-3:30a.m. and then from 5-6:30a.m. That afternoon, Miles & I left for Southern Idaho, while my mother-in-law came to stay with Grace. I had to do some work down in So. Idaho, and Miles decided that he'd make it more bearable for me by driving along with me. What a wonderful husband!! So we left Sunday afternoon, drove for 8 hours, and got to our hotel at 11:00p.m. At 8:00a.m. this morning I was at one social worker's office, spent 2 hours quickly copying paperwork from the kid's file, and then back in the car for a 2 1/2 hour drive to the next social workers office where I did the same thing for another kid! I'm now sitting in a hotel room in Twin Falls, Idaho. We're getting up at 6:00a.m. to drive the 9 hours home. Thank goodness Miles is driving!

I have a busy work week ahead of me, and then next Tuesday morning I leave again to fly to Columbus, Ohio for an adoption conference. I get back late next Thursday night and am hoping by then I'll be all caught up with my work and can crash. Pray for endurance for me!

Please keep praying for work for Miles. He is still trying to launch his aerial photography business, and we are both hoping that very soon that will take off and he'll make some sales. In the meantime, he's looking for work locally. Still no luck. We know that God sees our need, and am trusting Him to provide. It's just hard to understand the timing sometimes.

Nothing much new with Grace. She'll be having weekly visits with her mom. She had one already, which I observed via closed circuit television. This week I'll actually be in the room during the visit, helping mom to take care of Grace. Mom is very low functioning and still needs help with how to hold a baby, how to meet her needs, etc. I don't have any new pictures to post because I'm on the road and don't have my card reader. But trust me . . . she grows cuter every day!!

It's a Girl

Today we picked up a newborn baby girl from the hospital. She was born on Sunday, the 13th. Her family situation is up in the air at this point, so time will tell. Her given name is Nevaeh (heaven spelled backwards), but we're not big fans of that name so we're going to call her Grace. So far she's just been sleeping a lot, which is good for us! Here are some first pics. The second one is of Grace with "Flat Tyson," which is a flat version of my nephew (Deb's son). It is for a school project based on the book "Flat Stanley." I've been chosen to take care of Flat Tyson for the next few weeks, take pictures and journal his experiences. He went all the way to DC with me. :) So of course I had to capture a picture of him with his new foster cousin.

Sad Farewell --- again

We just learned today that this Friday (today is Monday), the state will be sending Jordyn home to live with his grandma. I have so many thoughts about this, but I think the news is still too fresh for me to make any sense of them. Even though I had been suspecting that this is what they're going to do, it's still hard to imagine having to say goodbye to him again. He is such an awesome kid and has brought so much joy to our lives. We will continue to pray for him to grow up healthy, and to come to know Christ one day. And we pray for Grandma as well, that she will have the wisdom and strength to parent him better than she parented Jordyn's mom.

I've had so many people this week ask me why we keep foster parenting, especially with all of the sadness we've experienced recently. And as difficult as it is, I really can't imagine NOT doing it. I know God has called us to this ministry and we just hope that one day we will have a kid (or two or three, or . . .) that we won't have to ever say goodbye to. Some of you may think we're crazy to do this, but I know we're doing a good thing, and more than that, I know we're doing exactly what God wants us to do.

Hiking Today

So if anyone in Prineville *ahem* ever gets tired of living there and wishes to move ... the days here are GLORIOUS. We went hiking today and after 5 months of snow a day of 70 degree weather is like magic.

Mission Trip

I am leaving tomorrow morning to take 13 wonderful high school girls on a mission trip to the inner-city of Washington, DC. It all started 3 years ago when I had the wonderful privilege to start co-leading a group of high school freshman girls. Well, the group has stayed together all the way through this, their senior year. Last August, my co-leader, Rychelle, and I met with our Impact pastor and asked him to help us plan a mission trip. We had been dreaming of doing this for quite awhile. So after 8 months of planning, praying, fundraising, and training, we are ready to leave for this exciting adventure.

We'll be keeping a daily blog of our activities, awesome moments, ministry and work projects, etc. Keep tabs on us at www.lakecitydc.com. And please keep all of us in your prayers.

The Boys

There's not much in the way of legal updates for the boys. Zackary's parents went to court yesterday, but there wasn't enough time for all of the testimony, so the hearing will be continued on April 4th. Just more waiting. Nothing has changed with Jordyn. He continues to see his mom once a week for 2 hours. I'm still confused as to the process because the timelines I thought existed don't seem to exist. Supposedly there isn't another hearing until the summer. So now my fear is that he'll go back to live with mom before then. I am fighting discouragement as I seek to trust God to work things out to make sure that Jordyn stays safe. I had a very blunt talk with his advocate yesterday about how they have placed Jordyn in danger by choosing to overlook some glaring issues related to mom's care for him. Please, please, please continue to pray for Jordyn.

I absolutely LOVE being a mom to these two boys. They bring so much joy to our house. Jordyn is such a ham and loves to make other people laugh. He also adores Miles and imitates everything Miles does. He has learned some new sign language this week, and now does the signs for "eat", "milk" and "all done." Zackary is quite the loveable little baby. He has started to smile at me when I talk to him. Miles has yet to witness it, so he thinks I'm making it up, but I swear it has really happened!!

Thanks to everyone for your prayers. I know God is faithful and has a plan for all of our lives.